When we think about creating good boundaries, most of us have an idea that “strong” boundaries are fixed boundaries – this idea is woven into the mainstream culture, a sense that who we are is mostly static and so things that we like stay that way, things that we don’t like stay that way. But this type of boundary can become stale and flat over time, a rote answer to life instead of a fluid, flexible, living relationship with who we are, what life means to us, where we fit in the world in a given moment.